No one wants to read even MORE about Covid-19 and yet, the numbers are going up or have gone up already. So, this piece will be short.
Is the world doing all that everyone can do or are we headed for another “lockdown”?
Those under 60 who don’t follow protocols and have parties or go dancing need to realize that their lives are NOT the only ones
Everyone is fed up with this virus now. That’s why they call it “Covid Fatigue”
Who wants to go out with a mask and continue washing hands and disinfecting things
Unless incapable of getting out, people are social creatures and need at the least, other people
Making even protests illegal (of all kinds) where there is little to no physical distancing or those wearing masks is paramount according to government criteria for social/outdoor gatherings
Parties, By-Law officers and police need to be hired and give out tickets as required to the highest levels permitted
Stores need to enforce their government’s rules, including ensuring people wear masks throughout the entire store, not just to get into them and follow arrows/footprints placed on floors along with the numbers of people allowed into them. No one needs to know the language of the country (though they should know key terms) to understand these symbols
Dorm rooms are NOT the places to have parties
Bars, dance and other places that do this type of thing should be shut down if they have “back doors” open and there are hundreds of people jammed together, dancing. drinking alcohol are not kosher or okay
You don’t live in a bubble with no one else around you. Even if you’re asymptomatic or young or whatever, you can give others the virus
Everyone is struggling in one way or another. No matter how fed up you are with things, there is NO excuse for you to march out into the streets, screaming and yelling at one thing or another, people are losing businesses. Major chain stores are closing down and re-formulating so, you aren’t the only ones to suffer nor, will you be
If you’re following conspiracy theorists, they’re not right about everything. They are theories only. Covid is real whether you or anyone want to believe that it exists or not
This is only a small list of things to take into consideration. If you’re not a believer, please be the first in line to get a new vaccine. Save the rest of us with things opening up.
From my little corner of life to yours, people are and have become far too lax and the numbers are going up whether one were to be fed up or believe it or not. We’re heading for another lock-down out of pure frustration by the authorities and we’d better not be protesting that decision.
With money being at the bottom line of everything, politicians being corrupt, a lot of countries ignoring rules as well as politicians and so much more, when is the world going to get it that there are personal agendas behind almost every living being on this planet. Our health and especially, this latest Covid-19 virus doesn’t matter as much as we’d all like to believe?
People want to be reassured by politicians that as the saying goes, “we WILL get through this”. Will we? Most of us want to believe so but, while most are doing their best to make that a reality, there are some who are putting everyone else’s health in jeopardy.
Take for instance the anti-maskers, the dance clubs, private parties, those who simply cannot forego a vacation especially at crowded venues or places and then of course, we have retailers who have plunked down those arrows or footprints, installed plexiglass panels, lists with numbers of people who are allowed inside, only to find no one enforcing any of it.
People are fed up and no one knows what to believe anymore or who to believe. We’re all tired and fed up with being stuck in our homes and frankly, Zoom and other methods of electronic communication have become not only old hat for many of us who are still trying to adhere to these regulations but, it’s becoming increasingly difficult to adhere to when we both see and hear so many others, including politicians who have access to testings that the normal population doesn’t have.
How many of us have gone through stores to get groceries or needed items only to find people walking around like they’re on another planet, ignoring arrows or decals stuck to floors, going up those designated as down aisles, reaching above other’s heads for packages, wearing masks to get into stores but, pulling them down under their chins as chin straps or beards would be worn, opening everything that they can, taking it apart and walking away? Where are the store security during these types of things? Why aren’t they there to stop people from doing the opposite of what everyone is being told to do?
Let’s go further. Where are the self-isolation officers who should be checking up on those newly arrived people to countries who should be slapped with fines and hefty ones at that, made to stay indoors to protect others from what they may have gathered from another area? What about airports where there is little to NO physical distancing, no body temperature checks done and hand sanitizer bottles broken or not filled?
How is it that people who travel to different places within even their own countries will go down to a beach or pool and tell everyone that there were a lot of people then say that they had little to no contact with others? Do they mean that they didn’t actually bump square into another person because they certainly cannot mean that they had completely socially distanced themselves from everyone else while at a crowded beach somewhere.
There have been news reports of parties, weddings, backyard gatherings, dance bars or clubs where people of are congregating. Equally, there have been reports galore of backyard or house or dorm parties whereupon by-law officers or whatever the cases entail, have shown up some day or so later and said, “they weren’t home”. Uhhhh….duhhh!!! Try that they were still in bed or not answering the door? Why is it that they didn’t try to get that person at other times especially during the time frames when the parties were being held. Heck, one party for instance had steamy windows with nearly 100 people. How is it that they can’t be caught in the act?
There are fines and huge ones at that but, rarely are they given out. Why? It’s often because they aren’t there in time or at the time. Why? It has more to do with the idea that there aren’t enough by-law officers to do their jobs on time because it’s not the deviation but, rather the norm now to toss regulations out the windows for some. What happens when people cry and scream that they cannot pay their rents or mortgages and would rather be on the streets while there aren’t enough by-law officers to make it around to everyone breaking the rules and yet, it may take a weekend or a day or two to train people to hand out tickets and arrive at these against the criteria idiots or disbelievers on time to hand fines out. They can all try to appeal to a court but, there are few if any trials being held due to Covid-19.
One smug moron has been fined and fined and fined and is still holding parties. Why is he able to do so? Is he that wealthy? No, not really. It’s likely because he charges a “cover-charge” to get into the party which will likely cover his tickets from law enforcers in by-laws. Let’s say that he has 100 people to one of his moron parties and each of them gave him $10.00 a piece to get into one of them. What would be the charge to him? Really. Think about it for a second.
Another establishment was finally closed down in the city that I live in. Why? Because while they appeared to be following the criteria from the front, they left back doors open and literally hundreds, if not a thousand or so people were face to face, dancing the night away to loud music, screaming at one another in close proximity, sweating, heavy breathing and all. Those in charge went inside and found it to be a total breeding ground for this virus and others. With alcohol and it’s likely many other substances floating around the place, inhibitions dropped and people were crazy in their actions. Am I sorry that this happened? Sure but, I also recognize that if they broke the rules a few times to lose their liquor license and be shut down, they don’t deserve to be open at this time or perhaps, ever again.
“So stay indoors and don’t go out,” people have told others who are trying.
That’s all well and good to say but, it’s a totally different thing to tell someone who has bare cupboards and needs to go out grocery shopping, mask in hand and on while entering, in and exiting a store, following the arrows and footprints on the floor. Not only are retailers looking the other way when infractions like chin-straps are being worn, customers are going up or down those aisles marked in the other direction but, it’s impossible to get our heads wrapped around how it is that this world has been so stupid and ignorant to such protection. How is it that any of us know what someone else has done the night before or even week before?
I‘m protecting you, you protect me too now!
If I or anyone else for that matter, bothers to wear a mask the entire time that they’re out or in a store, shouldn’t you do the same thing? It’s not as though anyone loves wearing a mask. It’s hot, it’s uncomfortable and adding a pair of glasses doesn’t protect me as much as it protects you. Shouldn’t you do the same thing for me too?
Politicians are breaking rules too though and admit it when caught
While politicians are people, not gods or in possession of crystal balls clear enough to see that the future, they also didn’t get to the position that they’re in because they were stupid. Yes, they have private lives too as well as families so, is it too much to expect that they would follow the same ideas that they’re putting out there or shouldn’t be doing what they tell others not to do?
It’s hard to remember that they have access to testings on a regular basis and usually at their places of residence that the general public doesn’t have. The higher one goes in the ranks of politics, the more true that this statement is. Taking a government jet somewhere within the same country or others, is likely safer than a commercial flight but, come on. Most regular folk not only don’t know where their next meal is coming from, have lost companies or work but, they don’t have private air crafts. Why shouldn’t these politicians be held to the same standards as everyone else is or that they’re preaching should be done? Why are they special? It’s because they’ve been voted into office by people who are down on funds, some with no jobs or risky ones at that and have elected them into higher positions because these people can talk a great story and make them believe. No one saw a pandemic coming or did they?
It’s hard to believe Conspiracy Theorists but, Covid-19 may be a virus that anyone could concoct one upon given the actions of a few to politicians and the sheer volume of tickets handed out thus far
I take Covid-19 seriously but, I also am beginning to believe that someone said, “oooops” in a lab somewhere and leaked out a deadly virus.
What was it that a virology lab in China was doing with a virus such as this? Did they engineer it to off/kill an aging population so that the governments didn’t have to pay out with pensions, nursing care, PSWs or other people? Did they think that perhaps, it wasn’t going to affect the younger generations who pay taxes, spend money all the while, downsizing the more elderly and infirm populations as it has? Surprise! It affected everyone in one way or another, didn’t it? Someone goofed up big time, didn’t they? Was there any coincidence that a politician has called it “Kung Flu” or “The Chinese Virus”? Is he that stupid? What’s he doing in office then?
Was it to get rid of an aging population or downsize it greatly then have the targeted age groups of 18 to 49 years of age, pay down the debt that every government in the world has? Was the ploy to get the Chinese to unleash it along with Russia and some other countries around the world? Did most of them know it was coming or here and going to do the damage that it’s done? Was anyone else aware that in spite of the trillions of dollars spent on a pandemic, it would rid the world of the “Mom & Pop” establishments and businesses, having larger ones reconfigure themselves so that their profit margins would be larger? Do these larger corporations (yes, most of them are corporations) care as long as their bottom lines come back into line? What’s their bottom lines? Profits.
Is it totally inconceivable as a Conspiracy Theorist has said that governments eventually rise to the top financially again within a pandemic and afterwards?
Look at the thousands of healthcare workers who have lost their lives in trying to save lives. Are they simply collateral damage or did no one predict that things would become so dire? Who knows really what was planned or if it was planned. Was it some “bat” at a wet market who bit a civet or whatever the story states in a communist led government? We all know that communist countries rarely tell the truth, right?
What about N. Korea? Did it have something to do with all of this? What about Trump and Trudeau, Putin and so many others we can name? Was “Little Rocket Man” in on it? Will we ever know? Hey, he killed his own brother and Putin’s regime allegedly poisoned someone so, it’s not impossible, is it?
The truth is, from my little corner of life to yours, no one knows right now except those who may or may not be involved. Am I taking sides? No, not at all but, I am saying that whether we like it or not, Covid is real. It’s a threat and no matter what anyone believes is the cause of it or not, the reality is that the ONLY control that we have over it all is to stay away from crowds, make a list, wear a mask, forego or order online what we want or need and stay the hell away from morons.
How many of us have gone into stores of late for things that we need (ie: food, medications etc.) only to find there to be worn off markings on the floors and not replaced, there being NO ONE to tell people that they’re going up “down aisles”, people reaching over others to get something, packages being opened as normally would, grubby hands/gloves (rarely ever seen in a lot of countries) and so much more that our heads would spin on their axises. In other words, people aren’t as vigilant about the “rules”. Even to the point of wearing a face covering to GET INTO the store but, wearing the masks beneath their chins or on their freaking heads like clown hats, means that no one, not even them, are being kept from this virus in any way. One cough even to clear one’s throat or sneeze will have particles spreading rapidly.
We do have protests going on, thanks to BLM (Black Lives Matter) with all races involved, perhaps masks but, little to no social distancing. #BlackLivesMatterButEVERYLifeMatters
It’s not that I side with institutions as much as it is that “rules” have all been broken and mainly (though not entirely) we see younger people doing this. We won’t get into the breakdown of races involved in them as I truly don’t know. What is known though is that there are cries out of “I’m Black so, I’m going to get it more often”. No Sh*t Sherlock! If you’re out there screaming, ranting and raving with little to no physical distancing happening, what do you expect? That’s the question that many have asked. You do the deductions on that one. Even hygiene, toilets, travel, accommodations and the entire lot of things that go with it, are questionable at best.
Recently, cars and trucks etc. have been broken into around the area in which I currently live. Top that off with a loud stereo system that had been going on and the volume being turned up even at midnight or later and police were called. Their reactions were less than stellar to say the least.
It was said that there had been a rash of break-ins during the past few weeks as well as a loud party where one shouldn’t be taking place at all, let alone during Covid times and the music at midnight and beyond needed to be at the least turned down. Could they come and see what’s going on since even ours and a neighbour’s car alarms went off so, there could be two different things happening at the same time.
Police simply said that there had been a shooting and he couldn’t free up officers to come to hear the complaints. When asked why the entire division had gone to a shooting call, there was only the answer, said sarcastically of course, “I could pull some guys from the shooting to deal with this if you want”. Without hesitancy, it was said “no…not at all. Keep the entire division/precinct at that shooting and I will take care of it myself.”
Was there any call back? No. How did this desk officer know what kind of weapon may have been available and used if any? Were they going to call in extra officers on duty to deal with potentially 2 shootings? What if there had have been guns involved? What then? Did they know? Did they appear to care? No!
This leads me to another question then. What does it mean when races are out to kill other races with illegal guns usually but, have a cop shoot a race, particularly of the Black Race and there’s protests, riots, screaming, yelling, marching, fires, looting and garbage everywhere along with so much more as well as media coverage. How does that work?
I have Black step brothers who both claimed that they had been stopped by police without provocation. Reality was, neither of them had ever been stopped other than for what others races would have been stopped for like running a red light or stop sign. “I’ve been stopped by police,” seems to be a mantra for a lot of the Black Race. Guess what, people? It happens to all races, not just yours.
Has one ever listened to the absurd screams of “he was such a good person” only to find out later that the person had a criminal record as long as their arms, had drug addictions, knives, guns and so much more at their disposal and that’s not to mention many had resisted arrest or fought back even if only verbally with a “f**k you” type of attitude and even words?
While being part owner of a business in a predominantly racial community, we came to know those who would incite issues to say the least. Clad in what one could only describe as cultural/racial clothing that better suited Winter attire in 104 degree weather or +30 Celsius, “Swag” or defiance in their eyes and on faces, we came to quickly spot “trouble” in those who did that. Sure enough, we had windows broken if we caught them shop lifting in time, we were held up by knife and gunpoint and honestly, they’d try to get away with as much as they could whenever and however possible. Sadly, we had been right to have been skeptical of them at the least as they were usually, the trouble makers.
Police had long since given up on catching even the Whites during drug deals and in spite of the fact that almost every store along that strip sold drugs. The reason being that as fast as they could catch them, they were lawyered up and back out and onto the streets, selling again within 48 hours or less. However, they all (no matter what race they were from) had halos over their heads. They were all wonderful according to those who were closest to them. Uhhhh…yeah.
I lost a friend to a shooting while putting her 2 boys into the back of her car to take them for lessons. She had nothing to do with the fight that ensued but, she was shot as a totally innocent by-stander to a running gun fight. Her 2 sons watched helplessly as their mother died in front of their eyes. They will forever be scarred and have moved away from the area with their father. Guess what race the murderers belonged to? Can you also make a guess as to whether or not the guns used to kill her were legal or illegal and where they came from? Try.
From my little corner of life to yours, the world has gone insane and everyone in it with it. “Rules” aren’t being enforced and like a prominent politician has said, we could stand out and shoot guns and not much happen. Let a cop do it though and it’s bedlum because people have the time to protest.
Keep it up younger folk. Get Covid-19 because you’re gathering “Herd Immunity” for the rest of Society. Don’t think though that doctors, nurses, police or anyone else for that matter should or can protect you if you run into trouble or want help. You can find yourselves sans help.
Be well, stay well and for pete’s sakes…follow protocols!
Not even putting in my usual ending here for obvious reasons.
Many of us know about professional sports players making craploads of money, having agents, getting the highest dollars possible and so much more. A lot of us also know that their boatloads of money being made are coming out of fan’s pockets and that owners make a killing for most teams during a non-pandemic year. Twenty-twenty doesn’t happen to be one of those but, it’s highly likely that what they’ve made the rest of the years, more than makes up for what they’ve lost this year.
Now, compare this to first responders and even cashiers who are paid crud yet, risk their lives on a daily basis. How do I know? I have a family member who is a healthcare provider and puts her life on the line every single day to save people. I have another one who works in a store where people of all types come in on a regular basis and they never know if someone has this pandemic virus or not. In other words, they are both, putting not only their lives on the line daily for our sakes but, they are paid sh*t by comparison to professional sports team members. Even the lowest of paid professional sports members make double to triple what these people make. Why? Could it be that we’ll all pay these guys to play the games as entertainment? The answer to that is a resounding “yes”.
People have gripes about everything from soup to nuts but, generally, their protests etc., don’t get in the way of their jobs. They all need money and they do their protesting on their times off. This is especially true of those who are paid the big bucks to play a game. Yes, you heard me correctly. They are playing a game. They’re not brain surgeons or astrophysicists.
Honestly, I get physically sick to my stomach in seeing overpaid sports team members “boycotting” games as a statement for their cause. Play the damned game, will ya? Either that or get off of the courts/fields, off of your knees during starts to the games or national anthems and protest or do whatever you want on your off season during a pandemic. Hell, you’ve been paid enough to do it and frankly, it’s now old to know that you’re paid so much to boycott a game or get down on one knee. Play or get out of the way! There are people out there who would willingly change spots with you and do it for half of the cost or less. You’re not unique but, you’re getting far more than those who do other things so that your lives can come to this sort of childish behaviour.
While I am somewhat of a sport’s fan for certain sports, the reality is that I am not about to pay professional sports players the big bucks to boycott games nor kneel down on one knee. Either sh*t or get off of the pot so to speak. Play the game properly or go protest until your heart’s content without pay. There are plenty of times when you can protest in off seasons.
From my little corner of life to yours, I see so many people, including cashiers, nurses and doctors, paid so little by comparison to those who play professional sports, risking their lives on a regular schedule and here these sport’s players are, taking the money and doing this crap?
My thoughts…either play or quit the game circuit altogether and protest right now until you can’t take anymore of it. Go ahead but, it’s said by many now that enough is enough. Either play the games that you’re paid to play or quit and protest without the money behind it all. Your status is not that important to most. You’re simply another jock with a stick, puck or ball in your hands or chasing after one. You’re not all that important to a lot of people or at the least, not as important as you think that you may be. Protest on your own time. No one cares if they’re not paying you. Bring up the numbers. Covid-19 numbers but, do so without pay.
***Please note that this is NOT a political statement or piece in any way. If you are going to vote for Trump, it’s your business. This is a piece about Melania Trump as a person and why I feel as I do ONLY****
It’s hard to feel sorry as I once did for Melania Trump. I felt sorry for her because she appeared to be a “beaten woman” who was bullied by Trump and his cronies. With Barron (her son) I felt as though Trump may have been blackmailing her into staying on as First Lady and why it may have been that she showed what was thought to be a grimace during Trump’s inaugural indoctrination. I was wrong.
Melania, as one already knows (I won’t get into her history here as everyone has found out) is in my estimation only, nothing but a Gold Digger who found the fountain of billions of dollars within the Trump world.
Her seeming slights, and facial expressions are nothing except someone who truly knows which side of the bread her husband *cough, cough* has buttered it and she’s aiming to keep it that way. She is not beaten nor is she downtrodden. She knows exactly what she is doing and why and she’s showing it full force by her dedication to Donny’s re-election perhaps, later this year.
Sleeping in different quarters and rooms, beds and even floors or wings of the White House is showing that Melania has lofty ambitions with money at her disposal. She’s not naive. She knows full well of her husband’s many infidelities and chooses to be the world’s laughing stock because there’s money involved for her and her son Barron.
Why is it that I’m saying “her son”? That’s because she dotes on that man-child and her husband, Don, never wanted him in the first place. She did and she had him.
She has her own floor in Trump Towers, as does her son and her husband. They all have their own floors and bedrooms. She comes like a faithful dog when called upon so that she keeps that money that she’s become accustomed to, flowing.
Is she stupid or foolish? Perhaps, as I wouldn’t want to be married to such a man but, her defence of him shows that she’s in it for his wealth and whatever it is that she wants or needs out of him. He knows it too. It’s not a secret to them or anyone else for that matter. As there was “Hush Money” spent on many women this man has had an affair with, there’s money for her to keep her silence and back him. While I used to feel sorry for her, I no longer do.
Calling Camp David and the White House “dumps” Is about both of their speeds. Her unwillingness and dread of moving into the WH means that Melania (no matter what she’s said as an excuse) didn’t want to be part of the WH and loved it better at TT’s. I have no empathy or sympathy for such a person or her wealth.
What can the world expect from this couple going forward, elected or not? It’s extremely hard to say but, my bet is that once Donny’s use for Melania is done and if there wasn’t a prenup signed, Melania will find herself someone new (if she hasn’t already done so) and be gone. For certain, once her son is of age to be on his own and completely away from her, she will leave for someone else. Likely, it will be for someone who has money. After all, that’s how she rolls and her lifestyle needs no changes or few. Getting rid of Trump will be change enough. It will happen at some point. Keep that in the back of your mind.
From my little corner of life, while I will not say what I think of Trump outright as this was not meant as a political piece in any way, I am willing to say that Melania has goals and trust me, she’s going to use them. While some may still have a soft spot for her, I don’t. As a matter of fact, I think that she needs to take her husband’s ramblings and perhaps, see him through this second term if he’s re-elected then, inject herself with some disinfectant. I say that with a tongue in cheek sarcastic laugh but, it’s not at all meant with realism. She’s a piece of work who needs no sympathy or empathy whatsoever. If you make a bed, you have to lay in it. She’s made hers.
Once you’ve lost “purpose” for someone or can’t do anything about their situation, you’ve often lost that person no matter how close you feel that you were. Often times, that feeling of “closeness” was not truly to be but, rather your own imagination as to how useful you were to them.
If someone has always expected you to be there for them in times of trouble and you have to say, “can’t do it for you”, they will hang around, hoping for the next thing that they think you can or should help them out with. Say “no…can’t do it” again and you’re going to find yourself less “close” to them. If you were to stop doing, doing, doing altogether or not giving out advice or whatever it is that they’ve become dependent upon you for, watch how quickly you’ll find out that you really may not have been close at all.
If you don’t believe me, try backing off in your own ways of course, from others and see where you’re at with them. You may be surprised to find out that you’re really nowhere near where it is that you thought you should be or were. It was what you COULD do for them that had them around you. It wasn’t for you necessarily.
Yes, we are all “Takers” in some fashion or another however, when you’ve found your phone barely ringing or doorbell not going or others aren’t seemingly caring about you, then you will know for certain that others have been “taking” from you in one way or another.
It’s clear that we’ve all come to some odd times in 2020 with Covid. Believe it or not, it has no brain and if it finds a host that will accept it, it’s going in. However, that’s not likely the case with others and if you’re relying upon someone without a brain too, my question would have to be “why?”
Again, if this written piece seems far out of field to you, find out who your true friends or where loyalties lay by telling those around you that you can’t do something for them and see where that lands you. If you’re unsure, try it again. It won’t hurt them because they’ll simply find someone who will do it for them. If you realize that they’re not around much, try even harder to stop doing for them. Chances are that they are only around you for what you can do and not you. Suspecting that this may be the case is grounds for you to test them further. Giving the wrong reasons such as “I’m too sick” or “my pet just died” isn’t going to cut the mustard. One has to say something like, “I can’t help you,” nicely of course and leave it there without explanation. Giving them explanations such as “I’m sick” or “I threw out my back” or something like that, only leads them to believe that when you’re well again, you’ll be back to doing for them and them sticking around for when you can do something for them again. Don’t give time frames. Simply say something like, “I can’t do it,” and leave it there.
Habitually being there for someone when they need something done for them or with them is harder to break. Not only have you become accustomed to having them around you and perhaps, you will feel the need to keep them there by doing for them but, they’ve also grown used to having you as their back-up or go-to person for whatever it is that they want or want done.
A lot of estrangements of adult children have taken place because the adult child now no longer needs you as they once did. Many of them are or do have others in their lives who will fill your shoes in one way or another. A lot of them don’t even realize that this is the case but, they will also blame parents or a parent for their own foibles or mental health issues on parents because they’re easy targets and always have been. When a parent can’t do anything more for them for differing reasons, they often find that their child will make them into monsters or other kinds of things that they need to stay away from being around. If they don’t do it, someone else will figure out how to gain control over them and oust you as a parent. A lot of the times, this person who also has mental health issues, will blame it upon their parent(s) and you. One way or another, your now adult child will find ways or excuses with which to estrange from you. Usually, it will be because you’ve said “no” to them or someone else that they rely upon for money, addictions or plain and simply because they want it. In other words, set up boundaries with or for them and they’re gone, don’t set up boundaries and they’re still gone to chase their tails. They don’t like boundaries or any kind. Start! Actually, you may be helping them by stopping.
I’ve always made it look easy to give out money for instance to a family member. I’ve never complained when giving it out to them. Doing so often meant that I’d have to go to the bank and cash in whatever little I had to give to help them out. However, there came a point at which I could no longer do what I had once done. Why? It came out of simply having no money left to give this person and it wasn’t a struggle. There was no more money left to give out. That ensued into a “you’re horrible” or “you don’t want to help me…woes me” type of scenario. Not only that but, I ended up being in trouble big time and in spite of all of the help that I’d given out to them financially, they took the money and ran, making me out to be some type of scary, sneaky monster who they don’t wish to talk to and leaving me in a total shambles with no money with which to do anything. That was my fault. I’ll admit it. Had I said “no, can’t do it” sooner and made it seem as it truly was, a fight to give them financial help, they only would have done this sooner.
Since that person and family have stopped talking to me, I’ve found not only do I have problems galore but, that they all have washed their hands of calling me. Sadly, the house has gone, our electronics have been taken away and no money to purchase more than a computer which was used, our only vehicle has gone and we’ve needed money to purchase another used one which is being paid for off of credit given by the dealer, our cat has died leaving us with huge vet bills, sewers have backed up into our basement due to broken sewers and money was needed to repair that while more things were tossed due to raw sewage, a huge neighbour’s tree fell into our backyard, crushing 2 fences which we have to replace lest our insurance company drop us and we can’t get other insurance, the pandemic hit and we’ve been stuck with no money. The list goes on and on but, suffice it to say that these people’s only concerns were of the family (in-laws) that live around them and talking to and helping them out as well as their now nearly grown children and gifts which we can’t afford.
I remember saying to one family member that a box of elastic bands may have seemed insignificant to some people but, those things meant a lot for whatever their reasons to the person who owned the boxes of them. Whether they rotted and were unusable or whether they were used, doesn’t matter. It was this person’s box of elastic bands. It wasn’t anyone else’s business what he did or didn’t do with them. Two and two don’t equal 5 even if that person can work it up to be in their own minds.
This is where estrangement from parents comes into play. Does it really matter if a parent or parents had to work 3 jobs to give their adults everything that they could give to them? As long as the parent made it appear “easy” to give, the adult didn’t value it all or what the parent(s) had to go through in order to give it to them. They only cared for as long as they could get something but, if the parent(s) had to stop giving it to them or even if they were still giving it to them, once they found a way to give to themselves, they blamed the parent(s) or walked away if that’s what they were going to do.
Yes, a lot of what I’m describing comes from a mental health issue or addiction of some kind. While many would love to blame the parent(s) or you for their issues, it isn’t necessarily so.
The question of, “what did you do” to cause it, doesn’t necessarily apply, nor do the terms toxic, narcissist, NPD, or whatever else they can come up with. In most cases there was no real abuse (even if they can work it up to that within their scripts or minds), nor is there any neglect. If that were to have been true, then why is it that some adult children will stay with even abusive parents and never estrange while others will walk off for crazy reasons? Does it make any sense to you? Are the ones who have estranged themselves calling those who don’t, insane? What’s that saying about the ones who do walk off into the proverbial sunset? It’s saying simply that they can so they do and frankly, there’s something wrong with them for doing so.
Don’t get me wrong. If TRUE and I mean TRUE abuse has taken place and having worked in schools as not a teacher, I’ve seen my fair share of it let me tell you, they have reason to walk out and away. It’s the way that save themselves further damage. I do get it but, that’s NOT what we are talking about here.
For those who believe that walking away is the way to handle things, think again. It’s not. It only causes more issues for you and others. Think about that the next time that you want to run away. It’s not helpful. It’s only harming you in ways that you may only be able to see down the road.
From my little corner of life to yours, be aware that if you’re doing, giving and never kicking up a fuss or keeping others in mind and what they may want or feel, try stopping it now. Try halting the gravy train slowly but surely and see who is left standing at the end. You may find that no one is left or few people are still there. That’s because they loved what you could do for them vs liking or loving you.
There’s no talk of estrangement here but, if you can correlate it to it, please do so and let us know how to do it.
It seems quite infantile for grown people to be acting like children with one ring-leader doesn’t it? Of course, that isn’t to say that the “adults” (excuse me while I cough at that word) haven’t got a mind of their own but, rather that someone has a bigger mouth than their own minds.
Take neighbours Marla and Peter for instance.
Marla walks around with the phone to her ear or texting almost on an hourly basis. Meanwhile, Peter’s mind has gone wild with both incorrect information which he’s fed to Marla and let’s say that Marla has her own agenda because she’s angry over something or other. What Peter had to tell Marla from his own mind, being so far from the truth that it’s unbelievable, fed Marla’s fire. Onto the phone where everyone and everyone could hear her “story” of woes and tall tales.
Marla is strong with how she explains things and being extremely convincing, Marla spread words that were false like they were weeds.
What Peter didn’t take into account in Marla’s zest to get more and more stories to add to her arsenal was that other neighbours, did indeed say hello to him from their car but, he didn’t see them nor hear them when they said hello in the dark. Winter being cold and icy, neighbours weren’t going to wait around for Peter to look up to see them or stop the machine he had going and was focused on. In other words, it’s not like other neighbours were going to hang around outside like a summer’s night, waiting to simply say hello to someone who was completely wrapped up in his mission. These neighbours had given up and were going indoors where it was warmer by far. Peter and Marla could barely raise their heads during the summer to look at the neighbours as they bounced from the vehicle that they drove in to the door. Why should the neighbours therefore, expend anymore time or energy on Peter seeing them wave to him during cold, frigid temps?
Marla, however, already fired up because neighbours had kept their words on “not bothering” her during a time in her life that they had had many times over already but, telling her that she could call when she felt up to it, couldn’t wait to spread rumours that were incorrect to everyone she knew and added Peter’s bits and pieces that he’d concocted in his own mind. Marla grabbed it all and ran with it. It was of delight to her “without prejudice” of course to do so.
Far be it from anyone to deduce what someone else is thinking or why. It’s not as though it’s even cared about but, the point is that Marla wouldn’t let it go. When neighbours noticed both Marla and Peter seemingly scraping their bodies against outdoor walls to avoid neighbours but, they didn’t know why it was happening and they called to ask what was the problem, Marla proceeded to send a rather lengthy letter filled with both incorrect deductions as well as having told everyone that she knew to the point where they too were acting like a pile of children. That included people she said that she hadn’t even told. Proof was that Marla couldn’t stand holding anything even if it was her own and Peter’s wrong deductions to herself. She indeed couldn’t wait to tell them as the neighbours knew that she would and as a piece of drama that she loves to create for herself.
When asked if Peter and Marla spoke to them, pre-dating this novel of a letter that was obviously both written and signed by Marla but had Peter’s name on it, Marla and Peter’s neighbours reply was simple, fast and adamantly said. “They sometimes speak and sometimes don’t bother. Just take care of yourselves and forget about them”. How wise those words were. They never did know the true reasons.
Fast forward to today’s time frame.
Marla and Peter continue their garbage and guess what? So do others that both Marla and Peter see. It’s not that anyone cares what this family does or doesn’t do. No one is interested in all reality. They are simply neighbours and anyone who has a brain of their own other than Marla doing the thinking for them all, would say to themselves, “that’s YOUR issue, not mine”. Not this group of people and it’s showing that they’ve allowed Marla and even Peter to do their thinking for them all. Marla feels herself to be powerful but, she’s really simply someone who is able to sway a bunch of people into what she wants them to believe. The truth is that she’s only swaying those people in her life and no one else gives a flying hoot what she does or what they believe or don’t. They are getting things out of her and honestly, she knows it too. The sad thing for Marla is that once she’s of little use to them all, she won’t be considered at all.
The last things that are to be said here are that Marla as smart as she believes that she is, missed the boat when she wrote to the neighbours that her sibling had “nearly died”. That had the neighbours wondering if she had even thought about the fact that the neighbours had lost a sibling to death? No, not Covid related. Had Marla even taken into account that her neighbours had not only lost a parent at the same age as her parent but, at much younger ages such as 54, 66, 72 and 53 years of age? Was there no thought whatsoever beyond herself? It appears not to be the case. Again, it should be added again, said “without prejudice” because the terms is a legal term which holds no water in her own words and personally. It wasn’t a document meant to be put into a court of law. To boot, during a time of a pandemic where no one hopes to get the virus going around, to tell a neighbour that they’re “dead wrong” is of course, laughable to say the least but, disgusting and says a lot about Marla’s and Peter’s characters.
So that said, it’s comical at the least for these neighbours to see and watch simply how far Marla’s and Peter’s incorrect assumptions had gone and Marla’s actions as well as those connected to her.
Mind you, from my little corner of life to anyone facing this type of behaviour, ignore it. It isn’t worthy of a second thought. It’s been proven over and over again by everyone who wants to use Marla’s and Peter’s brains to make 2 & 2 equal 5. Best of luck to them with their lives.
Are you ruminating too much during this Covid pandemic?
I don’t know about you but, I’ve found myself with far more to think about than I ever have. It’s not that there’s a lack of things that need doing but, it’s more that I’ve been thinking about things far more than I should, I suppose. What’s really bothering me is that I can do little about the situation of Covid nor, can I change much within my life because of this pandemic.
I don’t blame people for not wanting to work, work indoors, come inside people’s homes or such as I don’t want them to either. It’s beyond me that people are even contemplating school, sending their children, out at these stores where people have to work hour, upon hour. What’s really bothering me is that there’s so little that I can change on my own or even find nowadays. I’m in a depression, I think and I can’t get out of it no matter how many things I’ve tried to do for myself.
Things like a walk or a jog (yeah, like I can do that now after so many months of basically sitting around) can become “old hat”. It doesn’t matter how much a route is varied up, the point is that it’s becoming habitual. It’s no longer a thrill or even a must. It’s become part of a routine.
Washing hair daily or the thought of putting on some type of make-up has become a “what for” type of scenario. After all, “who is going to see me” is one question that stops me from even doing that much. Up until summer hit, I was barely putting on pants every day and just barely showering or brushing my teeth. Lovely scene in your head now, huh? The fact was the summer did hit and I was at the least, going outdoors more often even if it was to escape the a/c which I later turned down in order to not have to shiver when indoors too long.
It’s conceivable that anxiety and depression go hand in hand or that this pandemic has everyone somewhat anxious. I can see how that can be. What I long for is the day when the scientists tell us all that it’s gone or is well under control. Will I be with a wheelchair then? I say that with a half-smile but, meaning it as though it may be the case if I don’t move this wide load more now.
There’s Christmas to get through and Thanksgiving with no one around to get together with. There’s little use in putting on makeup to cover it up with a mask that will become plastered with makeup that no one will see. No one can tell us if even Halloween is still on. I don’t think that I’ll be buying any chocolate bars to give out this year. If I had my now adult who has estranged herself from her entire past, family, friends, uncles and cousins, I wouldn’t send her out either this year. Who knows though what next year will bring?
Still, when there were photos of jokes with people saying that they were taking a trip to their livingrooms for Easter, it got to me.
I suppose that mainstream media news sources sell airtime with the horrific details and negative news while we’re all clinging onto some type of hope for better days. While I was never one to go out much before, at the least, I could do so if I wanted to and when. Now? Not so much.
It’s not exactly wise to open up your eyes and look at Covid numbers or hear politicians in “campaign speeches” is it? That’s one thing that I should cut out doing. I needn’t hear the numbers every single day. No one should. That may be of help. I can’t interpret them anyway and they only seem to serve those who have to be traced anyway with lags in between the numbers anyway. What, for instance, we hear on a Friday, may have indeed occured a week or two ago? Then, we have add and subtract numbers to compensate for double entries and so much more that it makes one’s head spin with what’s real and what isn’t. What’s being manipulated, how, why or who is being tested and how that all works too. We don’t know and it’s not for us to decode the numbers anyway.
Add to this all the fact that no matter what I’ve tried online, it’s of little use because it’s a) summer, b) everyone is glued to the news or, c) people are working from home if they’re doing so and finally, d) I cannot compete with celebrities who have taken over the net with things. Why don’t they have separate areas or channels for them? Don’t they have fame enough already?
When I roll over to get up every day, I have to ask myself one question, “what am I getting up for”? I look at my dog’s little face and think, “he needs me and his life is going by. He doesn’t understand the concept of a pandemic and even were there to be none, while I might be freer to do things, his little life is as it is as well”. He gets me up every day just by looking at me and without doing so much as a whimper to be let out or fed. He’s just him.
That all said, vent away here. What are you facing? How are you coping? What are you doing to keep yourself up or are you down like me? Have your say!
We all knew that Covid was going to end the lives of a lot of people over the age of 60 and especially of those who were elderly or in nursing homes. What wasn’t thought of was the fact that a lot of the younger generations could not only get Covid but, who could spread it even if asymptomatically to those of more mature ages.
While people are shaking their heads to having grandchildren who are being kept from them because of Estrangement, one needs to methodically look at the situation as it is and why Grandparents may find to be thankful for not having Grandchildren as part of their lives.
As parents struggle with decisions as to how to deal with school issues, there is a lot to be taken into account for them, no doubt. Part of that is the potential spread of this virus to their teachers and other staff but, the other part is that parents aren’t exactly immune to getting it either. With that news, comes the idea that perhaps, if tested, not only will the teachers and staff members who have come in possible contact with the child will likely be placed under a quarantine order but, so will their parents and others who have come in contact with them. That can mean that entire classes of children and teachers are out of the classroom and perhaps, die or be put under quarantine but, it can also be that their parents will also have to be treated in the same manner.
What about estrangement and grandchildren though? How does it pertain to them?
Not only is it widely known by now that grandparents are of more mature ages with potential health issues or more chances of it but, even if healthy, they can become “spreaders” and entire groups of people that they’ve come in contact with, be quarantined.
If one has not lost their parents or more elderly relatives at a grandparent’s point in Life, they could end that person’s life as well.
Keeping in line with this idea, more grandparents than ever may be called upon to “babysit” these kids, pick them up or drop them off at various schools. This means risk to the grandparents and anyone that they are associated with. It only takes one person to cause an entire group of people to self-isolate themselves.
Not only that but, those who have any sort of immune system issues will certainly have to stop having their grandchildren and even estranged adult children over to see them while at home. It’s far too risky to attempt.
Summer is drawing to a close for most places in the Northern Hemisphere. Even if the Fall isn’t that bad weather wise or in states where it only goes down to the 50’s or 60’s during Winters, the issues are that a lot of children could be back in the school systems and frankly, if parents have decided that daycare is what they want or need for their children, there is little that any grandparent can do to change their minds especially, in the cases of estrangement.
While many people are using Zoom or What’s App or whatever one chooses to communicate with grandchildren, those who have been estranged from can count their lucky stars that they are not going to have to be the ones that get counted upon for babysitting purposes or online learning teaching reasons.
Some grandparents may be sitting back, reading this and saying that they don’t care. They simply want to hear from their now adult estranged children and their grandchildren. Take heart that if you weren’t estranged from, you’d likely be called upon to do some sort of babysitting at one point or another and that can put not only your health at risk but, those who surround you if you have anyone. Most people have at least one good friend or one person that they know who helps them even if they are disabled in some way or another. That cuts all of that off if there’s an outbreak within the schools or congregations of young children.
From my little corner of life to yours, remember that no one is immune to getting the virus. Those who have been tested as positive and who have also shown antibodies to it may or may not be able to get it again. The one thing to remember is that no one is invincible no matter what they think or do and therefore, there could be a second wave of it which may be worse than the first or other viruses or perhaps, it’s that there’s a self-isolation or quarantine that happens.
Consider yourselves LUCKY that you’re not amongst those who are having to take care of grandchildren at this time. Count your blessings and why.
I’ve had several incidents within the past weeks which have entailed me having to call police. They were mostly the same idea like fireworks that were being set off endlessly for weeks after firework days had officially ended but, doing so at 2 a.m. night after night. Not only that but, vehicles around my area were being broken into and things taken or damaged.
This often meant a barking dog or set of them, howling, whimpering, fear by them and so much more that no one got any sleep especially since dogs are so popular right now.
Last night, I had a few incidents happening at the same time and had to place yet another call where nothing was done about anything.
A loud party was taking place where not only was there no physical distancing involved but, the music had been going all day and all night with it now being well after midnight. Nothing was done or proposed to be done by police.
Car alarms were set off. Did anyone know whether or not it was the break-ins? No but, nothing was done by police nor, promised to be done.
Don’t get me wrong. I see that police have a plethora of crimes happening at any time of the day or night and mine was, well…less than what they were likely dealing with. However, to sarcastically tell a caller that they could “pull officers off of a shooting to attend to my concerns if I wanted” was less than called for to say the least. Not only that but, in the times that I’ve had to call in which I hate having to do in the first place, nothing was done or said could be done.
My response to the totally sarcastic remark by the officer was that he needn’t “pull” anyone from anything and that “I would deal with it on my own”.
What had me wondering what was thought about was the fact that I had said that I would deal with it on my own. How did this officer know that I wasn’t about to pull out a gun or something and take things into my own hands while playing the game of “The Wild West” where vigilante style, I wasn’t going to go and shoot up the place or person(s) breaking into vehicles? Answer: He didn’t and frankly, he didn’t care. There were NO calls back and no police to be had to help. I was met all of these times with only sarcasm and he did not know what race I was so, it’s not a Black or any other race issue or set of them.
By the time that I had arrived at the scene and car alarms were turned off, they had thankfully shut down the music and party goers were leaving the scene, no masks, no social distancing and well above the numbers permitted in “Social Bubbles”. This all led me to believe that anyone can do anything that they want and police won’t respond. I may as well have been a vigilante and done things according to my own wishes. What would they have done?
Is it any wonder then why things go un-punished and people are doing exactly as they please?
From now on, I will NOT be counting on police to take care of anything. I MAY be reaching for a weapon of some kind or another and doing the only thing that can be done besides complaining or wasting precious time on the phone. I will take matters into my own hands and heaven help those who are in the wrong or doing things wrongly. They’re not getting off freely again because police won’t respond to these types of calls. Oh, yeah, they may have other things to deal with but, it won’t be these people! Trust me.
So, Police while I have fought for you, I won’t be anymore. Defund the police if that’s what’s called for. I have NO clue why our taxes are paying their salaries anyway other than stabbings and shootings where they direct traffic more of the time than anything else.
Be well, don’t do wrong and beware of vigilantes. That’s what this world is coming to now, Covid-19 or not.